Cutting Back is Hard to Do.

As you may know by, 1. my lack of posts throughout the last two months, and 2. the fact that I apologize for it every time I manage to get a post out, life has been pretty hectic here in 2014. I’m still getting my workouts in, classes are great, work is fine, the boy is wonderful … but I feel like I’m constantly running (and not in the way I like to be).

The last six months of my life have been pretty whirlwind. I started a new (more demanding … and significantly better paying) job. I met my Marine (which made me realize that there really are great guys out there … even if I sometimes call him a jerkface, I can’t over look the fact that he took me to a ball and Hawaii). I’ve made new friends, seen new places, and, as my mother would say, finally allowed myself to have somewhat of a life outside of the gym and work. Granted, it hasn’t all been great – I (barely) survived the government shutdown a mere three weeks into my new job, and seriously, if the longest winter of all time is not behind us, I may completely lose it. But overall, I’m probably in the best place I’ve been in a long time.

However, with the good, I’ve realized that while I’d like to be, I’m not superwoman. I can’t do it all, no matter how hard I try. At the end of the day, I’m exhausted. Life has been a treadmill, and it’s been set at a 9-mile an hour pace (whereas my average running pace usually hovers more around 7). I’ve had to really look at what I can do to find a fraction of time in my life and start to catch my breath before I pass out. And it’s led me to do something that has me still struggling with some mixed feelings.

I’ve been teaching two classes on Sunday mornings for more than three and a half years now. And while I love my classes, I’m exhausted. I’m not making enough time for myself and the people and activities that are important to me outside of the gym. Which is why, though it was a hard decision to make, I’m stepping back a little.

Tomorrow is my last Sunday double. I’ll still be teaching Pilates every other week, but I just feel like at this point in my life, it’s too much for me to be committed to every week. Though it should already be, I still want to make it clear that I thought long and hard, and struggled with what I really wanted to do. I’ve thought about it for months, and even asked back in November if there was any way to find an alternate schedule. Unfortunately, I was only able to make it work for one class.

It’s tough to give up my Piloxing class, though. Honestly, it’s something I’m really proud of. I’ve built the format from scratch, introducing something totally new to a club that drinks the Les Mills koolaid by the keg. I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished with that group. I’ve seen many of my regulars become stronger, fitter…heck, I’ve watched a couple of them fall so in love with the format they became certified instructors. And I’m so glad I’ll still get to play with them every Wednesday.

This will be a change for me. I won’t have an alarm wake me up every Sunday. I won’t have to turn down plans because I have to teach in the morning (or I’m teaching during said plans). I’ll be able to go out of town without having to beg someone to cover a class for me. It’s definitely a change, and change is good. I’ll miss seeing those faces every week…but I’ve also missed having a life.

So there it is, the big news. The rest of my schedule is staying the same, so I’ll update on the new schedule early next week.

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6 thoughts on “Cutting Back is Hard to Do.

  1. Sometimes you have to make change, no matter how difficult, in order to better yourself. I’ve always thought getting a work/life balance is that’s important, though I seem to be working more than life-ing at the moment; but I still make time for everything else.

    Best of luck with the changes, and enjoy time to yourself and whoever you choose to share it with.

  2. I’ve struggled with trying to be “super woman” in the past and finally started throwing stuff off my plate. Best thing I ever did for my health and sanity! You’re still accomplishing so much and totally rock!!!

    • I’m with you – we definitely seem to be programmed to want to do it all … and feel inadequate (rather than, you know, NORMAL) when we can’t. You’re absolutely right though – breaks are a good thing, and at the end of the day, I’ve really only wiped off the edges of the still-full plate 🙂

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